So, I was messing around with my tarot deck the other day, like I do when I’m trying to figure stuff out. For the longest time, I used to ask the dumbest questions. Seriously. I’d be like, “Will I get that job?” or “Is this person good for me?” Just straightforward, yeah? Simple stuff.
And you know what? The cards would just give me these muddy, confusing answers. Or at least, that’s how it felt. I’d pull a card and stare at it, and it wouldn’t give me a clear “yes” or “no.” It was super frustrating. I almost gave up on tarot a few times because I thought it just didn’t work, or I was doing it wrong, which, turns out, I kinda was.
Figuring Out the Ask
Then I started thinking, maybe the problem wasn’t the cards, but the way I was framing things. It hit me that these cards aren’t really a magic 8-ball. They don’t just spit out future facts. It’s more like they nudge you to look at things differently.
I realized I needed to stop asking for a simple thumbs up or thumbs down. That just boxes everything in. Instead, I started trying to ask questions that kinda open things up, make you reflect a bit, you know? Get curious about the situation itself, not just the outcome.
So, I started to switch things up. My whole approach changed. I began to think about what I really wanted to know.
My Go-To Question Starters Now
These days, I pretty much always start my questions with a few key words. It really changed the game for me.
- What
- How
- Why (sometimes, but you gotta be careful with this one not to get too into blaming or victim mode)
So, instead of “Will I be happy if I move?” I’ll now ask something like:
- “What do I need to consider if I’m thinking about moving?”
- “How can I create happiness for myself, wherever I am?”
- “What opportunities for growth does this potential move offer?”
Or if I’m dealing with a tricky relationship, instead of “Does this person like me?”, I’d go with:
- “What can I learn from this connection right now?”
- “How can I improve communication in this relationship?”
- “What part of myself is this relationship reflecting back to me?”
It’s all about asking questions that encourage a deeper look, not just a surface-level answer. I found that when I started asking questions that begin with “why,” “how,” or “what,” the cards suddenly had so much more to say. It felt like they could finally respond in a way that was actually useful, more thoughtful, you know?
The Process I Follow:
First, I get clear on what’s bugging me. Just really sit with the feeling or the situation. Then, instead of jumping to a yes/no, I try to rephrase it. I’ll often jot down a few potential questions. I pick the one that feels most open and aimed at understanding or action, rather than just prediction.
For example, if I’m feeling stuck creatively:
- Old me: “Will I finish my project?” (Likely to get a confusing card).
- New me:
- “What is blocking my creative flow right now?”
- “How can I re-ignite my passion for this project?”
- “What small step can I take today to move forward?”
It’s a simple switch, but man, it makes all the difference. The readings are way more insightful. I actually get guidance I can use, instead of just feeling more confused. It’s about having a conversation with the cards, not an interrogation where you only accept one-word answers.